Now this isn’t about being a narcissist or a rugged individual. This is about living from the heart. Knowing what you need and want is a good thing. And giving them to yourself or asking for them is healthy. You run the risk of projecting your needs and wants onto others and in turn controlling and manipulating others if you ignore those needs.
This is a culture where sacrifice is seen as a good thing. But to leave yourself out of the equation is hurtful to you and those around you. At first it may not seem so. It feels good to be of help. But eventually you become resentful and project your needs onto others, which, as mentioned above, leads you to control and manipulate them. You begin to live through others and when they don’t do what you want, you become frustrated. It can be a pretty strange situation.
Let’s look at the word sacrifice. It’s related to sacred. It is to make sacred. You are not making yourself sacred by forgetting yourself. When you’re not in the equation you are not truly giving of yourself…making the act sacred, you are causing harm to you and eventually to those around you.
So, how do you get back to making acts of giving, helping, etc. truly sacred?
You live from the heart and put yourself first. This isn’t just the oxygen mask metaphor. It isn’t just utilitarian to put yourself first. You are a sacred and valuable being. If you don’t see it in yourself, how can you see it in others?
Take ownership of your needs and desires. Honor them and yourself. This way when you help someone else, you’re doing it from a heart that is fulfilled and can truly make any act of giving into a sacred one.
This is what living from the heart is all about. If this post resonates and you would like help putting yourself first and making all you do an act of sacredness, contact me to learn how I can help.
Learning to Live
Photos used under Creative Commons from h.koppdelaney, Irene Grassi (sun sand & sea), Lulu_Sunset, Maria Eklind, halseike, Kaarina Dillabough, liveoncelivewild, Christof Timmermann, built4love.hain, h.koppdelaney, Marcelo Campi Amateur photographer, sleepyjeanie, Alexandra E Rust