How to Find Answers When You Don't Know What to Do

The time to relax is when you don't have time for it. 
~Attributed to both Jim Goodwin and Sydney J. Harris

Lately you feel stuck in neutral. Little is going right with your work or your life. In fact you feel that there is every indication that you should quit your job, give up your business or just plain move out of town.

What’s going on?

When you feel like this and you just can’t think of what to do next, it’s time to relax.

You may think that’s the last thing you need to do. Don’t you have to get business rolling again, keep up with work and simply get planted and grind?

No. Not just yet. And I never think you have to grind. That’s the wrong energy to engage if you want to enjoy life. And if you knew what your next step was you would have taken it by now.

So when you don’t know what to do, you need to relax, let go and just be. Be in the moment and find some beauty or joy in it. Do what helps you release the tension around the issue and bring to it a light focus.

What I mean by a light focus is that kind of focus you get when you’re just lying on the beach watching the waves roll in and out. You’re not attached to any particular thoughts or to what you’re paying attention to. There is a sense of openness. This is where you want to gently guide yourself to when you’re upset about something and would like some answers.

The thing is the answers you seek are within you and within the situation, no matter how challenging it may seem. When we can’t see the answers or the next step, we begin to panic and it’s that tension that blocks us to the guidance we need.

The next time you find yourself spinning your wheels and unsure about what to do, take a few deep breaths, stop thinking about the situation and find a way to relax. The answers you need will come to you. Don’t rush the process. Rushing is tension.

But you can exercise rigorously for a few minutes, which will make you forget what you were thinking about and you’ll feel relaxed when you stop.

Once you are relaxed there a few things you can do to help yourself along.

Make a pros and cons list

This is to engage your left brain. Sometimes it helps to take a simple approach. Take each of your options and create a list of the things you like about them and the things you don’t like. See which one wins out.

Check in with your body

Get comfortable and think about one of your options. Notice if there is any part of you that tenses or relaxes when you think about it. You’ll know if it’s a good feeling or not.

Write it out

This works best if you’re trying to decide on a situation. For instance, if you need to know which job to take or what kind of coaching you want to do, write about what a day doing that work would look and feel like to you. When you put something down on paper it allows you to get enough distance to see what’s really there.

In the long run, it doesn’t really matter what you choose because you can always make another choice. You may do all the things mentioned above and still not be sure. Sometimes it’s better to just make a decision and go with it. Any one will do. It’s in the movement that you’ll then find out if it was the right one for you.

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